Here’s an astonishing thing:

I have purchased Brokeback and plan to watch it with my mum and youngest sister in a couple of weeks when SO goes off for training in another town. We’re going to make a night of it with fattening food and booze, and they’ll stay round.

Now, my second sister (next down from me) was round last night, heard me talking about the planned jollity and asked me if she could join in. I hemmed and hawed ‘well, I don’t think you’ll like the film’ etc and finally just told her outright that I didn’t think she would be able to keep herself from making ‘eww that’s gross’ comments wrt the content of the film. A discussion ensued, with her telling me that homosexuality is unnatural and me using every example and explanation I know to show her that it IS natural. I told her about the male emperor penguins who pair up and raise chicks. I told her about the fact that rats in crowded conditions are more likely to exhibit homosexual behaviour than rats in open spaces, indicating that it is a natural restraint on population growth. I explained that you are BORN gay or straight, and that as she could not choose to be gay, gay people could not choose to be straight.

Her answer was, ‘well, I don’t believe it’s inborn. It’s sick and unnatural’. To which I said, ‘well, that’s why you aren’t invited.’

OH DEAR GOD I’M SO BROODY!!

I went to see a friend and her 5month old son at lunch today, and that child reduced me to a small hormonal puddle. At one point I was bouncing him on my knee. He started to laugh and giggle, and after a couple of minutes I had to give him back to his mother because I feared total disintegration! Mine, that is. Not his.

I want a baby. I. WANT. A. BABY!!!!

Two things hold us up. I want him to be divorced. Now don’t freak out – yes he’s still technically married but they were separated for 2 years before he met me and she has been living with someone else this whole time. It’s a piece of paper. Which we will hopefully get soon. But I will not have kids with him until it’s done.

He doesn’t want us to have kids until he has a better job for better money. So these two things we have to sort out before we can start breeding like bunny wabbits. He’s broody too, just not as bad as me LOL.

My bellydancing post and Nelle’s comments on it made me think of how I look at people. This sounds very silly, but I think that most everyone has something about them that is beautiful, and I think that I think that because of Anne Rice.

Anne Rice’s Lestat is in love with humanity. Every person he sees has a unique beauty in his eyes by virtue of being alive. This undead person looks at an obese, facially scarred woman and sees her as beautiful. Lestat’s perspective caused a change in how I look at people. I don’t use the word ‘ugly’ any more in reference to how a person looks, only in reference to how a person acts. The change wasn’t even a conscious thing – I just don’t see people in the same terms any more.

That also applies to myself. I used to really obsess about my weight, but although I’m now the heaviest I have ever been (150lb on 5’4” frame) due to my recent forced inactivity, I’m not that worried about it. I’m beautiful and loved. I don’t have to be skinny. I’m looking forward to being stronger and fitter when I can go back to my usual routine, but I’m not obsessing. It’s wonderful :oD

I was saying to a friend how much I like the Pink song ‘Stupid Girls’. I would be far happier to suddenly put on a stone than to suddenly lose the ability to think. JK Rowling recently posted something along these lines:

Is fat really the worst thing we can say about someone? Is it worse than mean, vindictive, boring or cruel?
(full rant here: http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/extrastuff_view.cfm?id=22)

Food for thought. Mmm…food ;o)

I'm excited. I've preordered Brokeback for when it comes out on Apr 24th. I fully intended to see it in the cinema, but it's difficult to sit in a cinema seat when your leg is covered in fibreglass and sticking out in front of you.

So, hurray. I will finally get to see it and then I will be able to a: blog about it, b: read other people's blogs about it which I have been avoiding in case someone gives away the ending.

Hurray.

A Bellydancing Blog

Bellydancing is great. I miss it. There’s a lot of knee movement involved, so I can’t start up again until I’m fully recovered. Which isn’t yet. So instead of dancing, I’ll blog about dancing!

Bellydancing is probably the most feminine type of dancing I have yet come across. There is a common misconception that it is solely an erotic dance to be performed for men, but it was in fact developed by women and for women – a sacred dance, if you will, which has interesting health benefits. For instance, one of the movements most associated with bellydancing is the Camel, which is a wave-like movement of the stomach. On no account should this movement be done in the first trimester of pregnancy for fear of miscarriage, but if you do it in the last couple of weeks it can engage the baby’s head. When not pregnant, the movement strengthens the stomach muscles and massages the internal organs.

Of course, the erotic aspect is also there and it is essentially a performance dance, although I would say the overall character of the dance is sensual rather than erotic. It CAN be sexual but it doesn’t HAVE to be. Actually if you’re good, the suggestion is there but it’s never blatant. Bellydancers aren’t erotic dancers. There is a big difference.

One of the most powerful effects it has that I have observed is the effect upon the dancers themselves. You don’t have to be skinny to be an incredible dancer. In fact, one of the best bellydancers I have seen so far is at least a dress size 18. IMO the dance helps women to see that they can be sexy and attractive and gorgeous without being stick figures. Part of the way it does this is by getting them to get their bellies out, lol! I can’t think of anyone I know, regardless of size, who still covers their stomach after taking lessons for a year. You do at first, because you’re self-conscious. But as you go on, somehow you don’t need to hide your body any more. You become the dance, and the dance is beautiful.

AND you get to wear fabulous outfits like this:
http://www.geocities.com/bellydanceman/

Boo Hoo. I miss it.

I need a Blog To Do list. I've said I'll blog like 5 different things that have been tangentially touched upon and people (usually Nelle, lol!) have commented on in a 'would like to hear more' sort of way, or else have just occurred to me as entertaining future topics. Let's see now: Bellydancing
Driving lessons/tests
Science and theology not being at each other's throats
The Red Tent & the motherline
More memories of living in other countries and stuff about growing up a missionary kid
Differing opinions within healthy relationships, or How Not to Mind

I think I'll post this and refer back to it as my To Do list when I can't think of what to post. :o)

I SO agree with this:

S.C. May Soon Execute Repeat Child Rapists
State Senate Gives Preliminary Approval To Bill

COLUMBIA, S.C. -- The South Carolina Senate has given preliminary approval to a bill that authorizes the death penalty for twice-convicted child rapists.
The proposal approved Tuesday still needs a final reading before going on to the House.
It would authorize prosecutors to seek capital punishment for any sex offender convicted twice of raping children younger than 11.

more story: http://www.nbc10.com/news/8335069/detail.html

I support the death penalty for very few things, but child molestation is ABSOLUTELY one of them. A repeat child molester has voluntarily sacrificed his/her right to exist on this planet. I hope it hurts.

Actually, I would probably opt for the parents of the molested child/ren (or the victims themselves, if they are now fully-grown) to have this choice:

In a room with the perp. Perp in restraints, possibly against the wall. Table of shiny sharp implements by the door, for the victims/parents' easy access. Two hours of whatever you like. If the perp dies in the process, all the better.

This is good:

"God, I have a problem."
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy."
"And why is that Eve?"
"God, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"Man? What is that, God?"
"A flawed creature, with many bad traits. He'll lie, cheat and be vain; all in all, he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger, faster and will like to hunt and kill things. I'll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs. He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about. He won't be as smart as you, so he will also need your advice to think properly."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with ironically raised eyebrows, "but what's the catch, God?"
"Well...You can have him on one condition."
"And what's that, God?"
"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring...So you'll have to let him believe that I made him first. And it will have to be our little secret...you know...woman to woman."

HA HA!

Fabulous piece I came across:

http://ilyka.mu.nu/archives/164836.html

I have been Tagged. But I have no-one to Tag. Boo hoo :o( Oh well, let’s see how interesting/dull my life has been :oD

1. Who was your first prom date? Homeschooled, thus no prom. I don’t think English schools do Proms, do they?
My first date was when I was 14, when a boy who had a crush on me took me to the movies. He was a perfect wee gentleman, but I just didn’t fancy him. Poor lad.

2. Who were your first roommate(s)? Do you mean share a bedroom with? If so, my sisters. If you mean share a flat or house with, my first place ‘on my own’ was in a little self-contained studio at the top of a house wherein lived a family I’d known most of my life. It was very sad when I left, as the mother of this long-known family tried to get £300 out of me that I didn’t owe her. Awfully disappointing.

3. What alcoholic beverage did you drink the first time you got drunk? LOL, I remember getting tipsy at a relative’s wedding when I was about 5, having done the rounds of the adults’ table (after they’d gone on to the dancefloor) and finished off all the dregs of wine in their glasses! Early indications of my enduring love for rosé.

4. What was your first job? Au pair for a missionary family my parents knew. Looked after two GORGEOUS toddlers for about a year, during which time they got steady on their feet and started speaking. It was cool.

5. What was your first car? A very old blue Fiat Uno. Looked like a matchbox on wheels. Truly dreadful car. The first time I drove it was the day after I passed my test. My friend Naomi heroically agreed to be my passenger, as I was nervous of driving alone. In that first ride, I grazed a cyclist with my wing mirror (it was his fault, honest!), and we found that the car had a serious flaw. We were on a fairly steep hill, waiting to go into a parking area. There was a lot of traffic coming across, so I put the handbrake on and released the footbrake. And we started to roll backwards, towards a nice little white car that was stopped behind us. Which is when we realised that the handbrake didn’t work. That was scarey. Collision was avoided by judicious use of the biting point, but we were both rather shaken.

It’s not really any surprise that I have since lost contact with Naomi…. ;o)

6. When did you go to your first funeral? My great-grandmother’s, about 15 years ago. She was a very Victorian, stiff-upper-lip sort of woman. I never really got to know her. By the time I was old enough to be ‘seen and heard’, she was too far gone with the effect of several strokes to be interested in me.

7. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown? Tricky question. I don’t consider that I had a hometown until my parents settled here when I was 15. Even then, I moved away again when I was 16, so it wasn’t really MY hometown until I moved back from the Ukraine just before my 20th birthday.

8. Who was your first grade teacher? My mum, lol! Who was also my 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th….well, you get the idea ;o)

9. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? I think it was when I was 7, @ 1986. We went from England to India for 8 or 9 months, and thence to Thailand for about a year.

10. When did you sneak out of your house for the first time, who was it with? I really don’t remember. I remember sneaking out of the house in the Ukraine to smoke (the Christians I worked with really frowned on that) with a couple of the other teenagers. But the first time….nope, memory insufficient beedibeedibeep

11. Who was your first Best Friend and are you still friends with them? Liefke, the daughter of missionaries my parents were working with when we were in Thailand. We kept in touch for about 5 years, but I’ve long since lost contact with her.

12. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parents' house? Watford, for previously-mentioned au pair role.

13. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day? Dream Man. Who is currently enjoying a Sunday am sleep-in. I couldn’t sleep past 8.30 today, for some reason. Odd. Maybe I was supposed to get up and answer this Tag :oD

14. Whose wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid/groomsman? David and Beth’s. I was 15 or 16 I think. Got trussed up in this hideous dress that didn’t fit and flattened my boobs. Only time since they started growing that I ever looked flat-chested, lol! It was so uncomfortable!

15. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Kiss DM (who gets up 30mins later), roll out of bed and get in the shower. Mmmm, shower…..

16. What was the first concert you ever went to? Um, this is a tad embarrassing. I have never been to a proper concert. I went to the Homelands dance festival in 2000 (I think), but that’s not quite the same thing.

17. First tattoo or piercing? What age? Ears, age 11. Then again at age 13 because the holes closed up. I didn’t like earrings at age 11. I’m far too scaredycat to have somebody repeatedly poke me with a needle for a tattoo, and I’m not keen on having any body piercings.

18. First celebrity crush? Oh god do I have to say? The first I remember is Benjamin from 7 Brides for 7 Brothers (don’t know the actor’s name). In my defence, I was REALLY young!

19. Age of first kiss? 7. I was precocious.

20. First crush? 7 again. I had my first ‘boyfriend’ at that age. We would walk around holding hands and occasionally be more daring and kiss each other when no-one was looking. We were a bit like the Love Is stickers, lol!

21. First time you did drugs? My first proper drug experience (I don’t count the occasional toke on a joint) was my first ecstasy pill when I was 20. I was clubbing and only took half a pill, but it was an incredible experience. The music was in me, was my own blood. It was really amazing. After that, I had a great year and a half with my then boyfriend and our circle of friends, going to the same awesome club every Saturday night, taking an E and having a blast. After about 18 mos I got tired of it and stopped taking. No addiction, no issues. Just done. BTW, if anyone reading this would like to understand the UK drugs-and-clubbing experience of the late 90s, get the film Human Traffic with John Simms.